Thank You, Bipolar

Grocery stores are overwhelming. Big, bright, full of people and noise. You go in with a list and come out grumbling with a headache.

At least my husband does. After a Saturday morning of errands, we returned home together but in 2 very different moods. He was quiet and surly, complaining that he needed to decompress after being so frazzled. I was chipper and upbeat.

What' s my secret? How do I maintain positivity in the face of daily annoyances? Perspective and gratitude. And I have bipolar to thank for that.

My bipolar has involved plenty of suffering

I, like everyone with bipolar, have been through a lot. The soul-crushing pain of depression and the memory-destroying electroconvulsive therapy treatments.

Manic choices that were so mortifying that they still make me blush. The disaster that is a mixed state that caused me to break down in front of my classroom and lose my job. I am also permanently disabled by medication side effects, a not-so-gentle daily reminder of what I've had to endure just to get a decent shot at life.

Looking back on these experiences, they can feel like a Shakespearean tragedy, with one disaster on the heels of another.

One result? Gratitude

But there is nothing like suffering to pave the way to appreciation. I appreciate everything. I appreciate that I can afford to buy food. I appreciate that I have the physical and mental capacity to leave the house. I appreciate that I am alive to experience the hassle of the store, the inconvenience of traffic, and even the inflated price of groceries.

Do I love all of those things? No, but I love being here and having the opportunity experience them.

We can choose our outlook, despite bipolar disorder

Those of us with bipolar lack choices in many areas. There aren't always great treatment options and we may be forced to sacrifice physical health for mental health. We may have to restrict our lifestyles, forgoing late night parties or casual alcohol use. Even the choice of whether or not to have bipolar at all somehow passed committee without us having a chance to veto it.

But one choice we do have power over every day is how we approach the world.

You're surviving!

If you live with bipolar disorder, you are a champion. Every day you survive what's being thrown at and asked of you, you win. Take those victories and put them towards a pair of gratitude-colored glasses that you deliberately slip on every morning. It will change your life.

You can choose to approach the world as if it is one huge inconvenience. That's fair sometimes, especially if you're experiencing symptoms or struggling to maintain wellness. On the other hand, you can choose to approach life as the blessing it truly is.

Gratitude is a gift

When you shift your attitude to gratitude, every moment, every experience, every person - even the difficult ones - feels like a gift.

Thank you, bipolar, for helping me see the world for the gift it truly is. Even the grocery store.