Work-Life Balance is a Key to Stability: Is it Possible?

A perfect balance between work and life feels like a pipe dream in a world where billionaires are heroes and the price of living continues to rise. We’re surrounded by hustle creators, told we need more, and face outside expectations of a career, marriage, home, and family. Yet, where is the focus on our soul? Our physical and mental health? Living with bipolar disorder requires the last two just to survive, let alone work.

Bipolar disorder and work-life balance

Am I good at it? If I wrote this article a week ago, my answer would have been, "absolutely!" After therapy this week and a little digging through my calendar (an incredible addition to my life), I feel like quite possibly the least qualified person they could find to write on this subject.

My therapist reminded me of a few finer points of the last 3 years of my life. I’ve moved twice, the first creating a gap of 6 months with no work. For another 6 months, it was 2 shifts a week. Financially ruinous. Good start. Then, for a year and a half, I worked my first office job. A simple 9-5 with a nonprofit, I (naively) figured. And proceeded to consistently take on more responsibility without extra pay for the next 18 months until moving… again.

Another 2 month gap, and a winter of inconsistent night work, and 7am basketball practices. Not good: part II. Then leading up to this article, the impossible happened. I figured out how to build a healthy and sustainable work-life balance… for 3 months.

Working nonstop and burnout

I started coaching basketball on the side, and the shifts kept-a-coming and didn’t stop. Since I was asked to write this 9 weeks ago, I’ve had 9 days off and worked 11 doubles. So much for that. However, and this may be a feeble defense. There were reasons.

I needed the money and took time off when possible and/or necessary. After 2 moves, lengthy employment gaps, and high costs, this was my opportunity to dig out. Coaching did become quite a time commitment with driving, but it was fun and didn’t feel like work. Yet, it’s still not a day off, and days off are unfortunately required. There is something distinctly more relaxing and rejuvenating when there is nothing you have to do and nowhere you need to be. This is the only time when true processing, check-ins, and recovery are possible.

That doesn’t mean it can last forever. In that time, I took a few of those days to visit family. I didn’t pick up at least 3 shifts, canceled a coaching session, and postponed dinner with a friend. Awareness of our limits is imperative.

Watching for warning signs of hypomania and depression

Many times throughout this time, my brain and energy went up a few notches or down several. I was almost constantly aware of the consequences and warning signs of hypomania or depression. The cool part? I adjusted my schedule, got more sleep, resisted a nap (or took one!), didn’t go shopping too much, prioritized movement and getting outside, and did everything possible to stay true to myself and my only real goal: stability.

What helps me find work-life balance with bipolar disorder

In my opinion, work-life balance does happen, but not very often. When it requires so much time and energy just to be content with life, it feels damn near impossible. However, there are a few things we can do to help if we are lucky enough to have the right diagnosis, medication, and care team around us (and many do not).

We can trust our therapists to correct, speaking for myself, incorrect internal narratives and encourage us to prioritize our health. We can take a day off when necessary and if possible. We can get outside and surround ourselves with those we love. Most importantly, figure out what is best for our own unique situations.

Maybe a regimented 9-5 is perfect for you! Or you have an incredible skill and can be self-employed. For me, it’s a manageable serving job, a few mental health side gigs, and coaching basketball. Most importantly, it provides the flexibility to take a day when I need it and prioritize seeing my wonderful siblings, nieces, and nephews. Will it last? Who knows, but it’s working for now, and that’s all I can ask.

Prioritizing mental and physical health to avoid burnout

We have to prioritize our mental and physical health. If not, we’ll burn out and need a few months off (guilty), not live up to our potential, and possibly lose employment. That’s so much easier said than done. Most things that lead to stability usually are. That doesn’t mean it’s not possible. We got this. Hang in there.